Reading: Spiderweb by Penelope Lively. Last week I placed a hold on this one and Gotham, and they both became available today. I'm reading Spiderweb, by far the shorter of the two, first.

In and Out

Recently my three boys were playing together inside on a rainy day. Daniel had allowed Matthew, but not Stephen, into his room. At first Stephen laughed and played along, pretending to be a monster pounding on the door, but when he realized Daniel would not let him in, he became distraught and sat on the steps crying.

Ordinarily, I would have intervened at this point. We allow Daniel a certain amount of autonomy when it comes to his room--he can choose not to allow his younger brothers in at all, if he wants--but the inequity of inviting in one twin but not the other would usually prompt me to take action.

I have some doubts about the value of adult intervention into children's interactions, however, so this time I did nothing. Besides, I was curious to see what would happen.

After a few minutes, Daniel relented and invited Stephen in. Then Matthew wandered out of Daniel's room and Daniel slammed the door shut on him. Now there was another little guy crying on the stairs. And Stephen, forgetting his own hurt at being excluded, gleefully took part in taunting Matthew: "Ha ha! You can't come in," he sang. You'd think he would remember how it felt to be the one left out, but I guess a 3-year-old doesn't have much empathy.

Kids learn all too soon and all too well the oldest technique for making your own little group feel special: leave some one out.

This incident came to mind when I read the recent news about Jerry Falwell's latest pronouncements. Apparently he is rallying his followers to boycott Anheuser-Busch, objecting to the company's advertisement for Bud Light showing two men holding hands in a gay-oriented magazine.

As a Christian myself, I am appalled by this purported Christian's hate-mongering. He is just an extreme example of what angers me about so many of the fundamentalist Christian groups. They draw narrow lines of bigotry and intolerance and label anyone who falls outside those lines evil. I guess it makes them feel special to believe that they alone walk the path of righteousness.

I'd like to think that grownups, particularly those who claim to be followers of Christ, would behave with more maturity than my six-year-old son.

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