Reading:, or rather, re-reading, Ladder of Years by Anne Tyler. Having misplaced Beach Music yesterday, I was scanning the bookshelves last night trying to find something to read, when my eyes lit on Ladder of Years. The protagonist is a wife and mother who one day impulsively walks away from her family and starts a new life. It allows me to live my own escape fantasies vicariously and is thus one of my favorite Anne Tyler novels.

Background courtesy of
Ace of Space

Erotic Dreams

I must have been thinking too much about touch yesterday; early this morning I had a quasi-erotic dream about Bogdan, our cute Ukrainian next door neighbor. In the dream, Bogdan was embracing me and trying to entice me to bed, but I resisted, reminding him I was married. I enjoyed the dream and the feeling of being desired; as I drifted in and out of sleep this morning, I kept trying to find my way back into the dream.

I rarely have erotic dreams about anyone other than Tab these days. When we were first living together and in the early years of our marriage, I often dreamed about previous lovers and would awaken feeling disturbed and vaguely guilty, as though I had betrayed him. As soon as I stopped feeling guilty about dreaming about others and decided just to enjoy them for what they were, those dreams stopped.

In less than a week we will be going to Maine for our annual week-long visit with my family. The kids are excited and literally counting the days; but the pressure to finish work before we leave as well as prepare for the trip itself is causing Tab and me to become snappish with each other. This often happens before our trips to Maine. Tab is feeling especially stressed because he has a number of work-related projects he needs to complete before we leave; I have a few, too. And then there are a lot of things we need to buy before the trip, not to mention all the packing.

Every year I vow this year will be different and we will get through the days before the trip without fighting, but every year we have either one big fight or a lot of little skirmishes.

previous       index       e-mail me       next